Friday, December 12, 2008

Death and life continues

Yesterday morning Dr. Callaway came to class, eyes red and moist and announced that Dr. Holcombe, our beloved poli sci chair, had collapsed in his office. She informed us that he had been taken to the hospital.

We were silent for most of the class presentations, shocked but hopeful for him.
At the end of class I was slow to gather my things.

Dr. Callaway is not an expressive woman. She is calm, composed, and amazingly placid. Getting her to smirk or giggle has become routine for me but an aloud laugh is something that still lights me up. It's an accomplishment.
Yesterday was the antithesis of all those high moments.
Still, she managed to hold it together in the face of a distraught student who received the news that he had in fact passed. The girl was barely able to form the words and found herself on Dr. C's shoulder, crying.

We left them and Callaway comforted her for a time before confirming the news to us, the lingerers who waited pensively out side.

I called Alyx, Sarah, and Nathan to tell them, unable to enjoy the rare snow in Texas that i crushed in my hands to keep them still.

I went to LDB and found Dr. Cooper and let him know that I might be late to our class because of what had happened.
I needed to check on people, talk to someone.
I ended up crying in the geology office.

AB 1--third floor--quiet.

I found myself in Callaway's office, offering anything she needed, worried for her.
"You all have so much to worry about, you shouldn't have to deal with this"
"We all need to deal with it, people are more important. We care about y'all"

They're surrogates, para-parents. While mom and dad can prepare you and raise you for your life in so many ways, professors prepare you to serve your passion, to do all those amazing things you've always dreamed about.
I get very invested in my professors. They're valuable assets. So when I see them in crisis--I am concerned.

We talked for a while, still shocked.

That night I called Alyx. We discussed the physical affect Holcombe's laugh would have in heaven. Tornadoes, we decided, would be the result.

Sporadic tears.

It wasn't until today when June, at work, asked us if we saw the email from SHSU about the death of Dr Holcombe that it all sunk in.
"Did you hear about the professor that died yesterday?!"
"Yes, June, I know about it."

Under five mins later, I lost the battle with my tears and April took me on a quick nature walk to get my mind off of it. She's a dear.

He was a great man, you know, huge personality, brilliant mind, amazing man. His laugh was huge and heartfelt, it was something that made the whole floor warm and welcoming.
His presence is missed already.

I am still worried about my professors. Emails have been sent, I want them to know that their students are here for them.

The funeral is in a week.

This afternoon and evening have been wonderful though. After April's walk, I was feeling much better. I love being outdoors, really.
We had a christmas party in the office. lots of food. Gwen makes a killer dish. seriously delicious.

We all put five dollars into a mega millions lottery pool. I've got plans for that money already!! haha
Far fetched sure, but you know, why not?

Tonight is also my 5th anniversary with Nathan!!
We had pizza, watched some stand up, cuddled, spent time together, good times :) I like it.
He had a job interview today!!! It seems like it went well so cross your fingers!!

I would really like this up turn to stay up. Get the job, win the millions--either one is great.